African American Entertainment > Entertainment > Explaining Santa to kids today Message Boards, Chats and Profiles

iammrgrinch
To : Rebel_G

Date: 12/26/2007 02:51:38 PM
Total Posts: 13285 Msg 219912.12

in Reply To :

In a society with Ipods, the internet, FedEx, etc, how would you explain Santa Claus to today's kids?

Mr. Grinch being serious!!!!!

what parents NEED to do is send me emails and allow me to visit their homes, to have that talk with the kids. I'll tell it how it t.i.s. !!!!!

Id say the following: "look kid, your parents are goddamn liars, they been lying to you all your life and now theyre paying me a very considerable fee to do their dirty work of telling you the truth. Santa Clause is and always will be a goddamn figment of somebody's wild, PCP pill-poppin imagination. NOONE climbs down chimney's child......thats like trying to shimmy your way up a comstupated girraffe ass......just plain ol' stupid!!!!

Your mother and father spend countless hours trying to redirect your attention so that can later con you into believing some fat,happy asshole in a red suit gives you gifts...the man at the mall playing Santa, is an actor and a pedophile who had his eyes on your crotch...........your Xmas list went directly in the trash the moment you gave it away.

All the reindeer are bullsh*t....the only animals that fly are birds, bats, various insects...and me when Im off a damn good marijuana buzz like I am right now.........and questions ya lil mothaf*cka?!?!".....DONT ASK ME NOTHING...shut the Hell up, get outta my face....see ya for New Years......b*tch."

*droppin the mic....walkin off stage"

WARNING:

This poster may cause: Hysteria, paranoia, psychosis, mild headlice, cancer, rash, fever, diabetic coma, memory lose, uncontrollable laughter, swelling of the testicles, flatulent gas build-up, aching overies, headaches, cramping, spasms, random crying, arousal of anger, morbid thoughts, a need to taste dogfood for the first time, catlike reflexes, aching joints, diahreea, a lust for grape jelly, growth of fur around the nipples, dry or cottonmouth, dyslexia, hypoxia, asthma, loud burping, insomnia, the inability to relax both middle fingers, profanity, nudity, molestation of all that is logical and rational, blood clotting.....and moments of disfunctional horniness, and you might even want to fight a n*gga or two.

Due to the graphic nature of this poster, viewers are strongly urged to run for covor, hide all children under the age of birth, inhale deeply and tongue kiss your a$$ goodbye. Mr. Grinch is not responsible for the likness claims and/or disputes made by you puney mortals. Closed Caption for the magically enchanted, Handicapped parking FOR EVERYONE, random middle finger movement for the blind, free liquar and illegal narcotics for everyone....peer pressure is a b*tch so ya better just get high and let it be.

Happy Holidays, Motherf*ckers.

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Rebel_G
To : savedangel25

Date: 12/26/2007 03:20:35 PM
Total Posts: 37705 Msg 219912.13

in Reply To :

i see your point

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Rebel_G
To : coybacon251

Date: 12/26/2007 03:27:41 PM
Total Posts: 37705 Msg 219912.14

in Reply To :

how did she take it?

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Rebel_G
To : iammrgrinch

Date: 12/26/2007 03:28:28 PM
Total Posts: 37705 Msg 219912.15

in Reply To :

uh, you've been reading/watching The Boondocks again, huh? LOL

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iammrgrinch
To : Rebel_G

Date: 12/26/2007 03:35:42 PM
Total Posts: 13285 Msg 219912.16

in Reply To :

LMAO!!!! maaaan, I just try to keep it real wit the kids.

I know I can be harsh and sometimes kinda cruel...but dammit if they wont know the real deal when Im done, lol.

WARNING:

This poster may cause: Hysteria, paranoia, psychosis, mild headlice, cancer, rash, fever, diabetic coma, memory lose, uncontrollable laughter, swelling of the testicles, flatulent gas build-up, aching overies, headaches, cramping, spasms, random crying, arousal of anger, morbid thoughts, a need to taste dogfood for the first time, catlike reflexes, aching joints, diahreea, a lust for grape jelly, growth of fur around the nipples, dry or cottonmouth, dyslexia, hypoxia, asthma, loud burping, insomnia, the inability to relax both middle fingers, profanity, nudity, molestation of all that is logical and rational, blood clotting.....and moments of disfunctional horniness, and you might even want to fight a n*gga or two.

Due to the graphic nature of this poster, viewers are strongly urged to run for covor, hide all children under the age of birth, inhale deeply and tongue kiss your a$$ goodbye. Mr. Grinch is not responsible for the likness claims and/or disputes made by you puney mortals. Closed Caption for the magically enchanted, Handicapped parking FOR EVERYONE, random middle finger movement for the blind, free liquar and illegal narcotics for everyone....peer pressure is a b*tch so ya better just get high and let it be.

Happy Holidays, Motherf*ckers.

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tee000caint
To : Rebel_G

Date: 12/26/2007 03:50:05 PM
Total Posts: 886 Msg 219912.17

in Reply To :

my kids ages 10 and 6 understand that no big fat white man in a red suit brings their gifts...and that since they receive treats year round for great grades and behavior, that they are happy with one or 2 simple items for xmas...we don't really celebrate it--the xmas cheer should be a 365 thing...

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tee000caint
To : Rebel_G

Date: 12/26/2007 03:57:17 PM
Total Posts: 886 Msg 219912.18

in Reply To :

oh gosh yes! christmas movies are the greatest!

we bought a box set with frosty the snowman and all nem and then another box set with a christmas story, elf and national lampoon's xmas vacation and had a marathon, lol lol

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tee000caint
To : savedangel25

Date: 12/26/2007 03:57:49 PM
Total Posts: 886 Msg 219912.19

in Reply To :

^5!

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coybacon251
To : Rebel_G

Date: 12/26/2007 05:17:00 PM
Total Posts: 19578 Msg 219912.20

in Reply To :

how did she take it?

Surprisingly well. I didn't really say much and she immediately stopped all of that "Santa" shit and started handing the kids presents and saying who they were from. The atmosphere wasn't conducive to persisting in that fantasy nonsense, because neither my brothers and I nor our spouses are really on that.

GH: Who in your mind are some of the best defensive players over the last 40 years?
MB: That's a mix. Lemar Parrish and Kenny Riley were great cornerbacks. Tommy Casanova was a tremendous free safety. (David) Fulcher was an overpowering strong safety. Bill Bergey was a first-rate linebacker. Coy Bacon is the best pass rusher we ever had.

Coy had 22 sacks (in '76). He was the best pass rusher I've ever seen.

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Rebel_G
To : iammrgrinch

Date: 12/27/2007 06:20:40 AM
Total Posts: 37705 Msg 219912.21

in Reply To :

yes
sometimes the straight dope to kids makes things interesting and makes them think too!

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Rebel_G
To : tee000caint

Date: 12/27/2007 06:21:35 AM
Total Posts: 37705 Unread Msg 219912.22

in Reply To :

now, thats interesting

I learned right away as a kid my parents brought the gifts

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Rebel_G
To : tee000caint

Date: 12/27/2007 06:22:19 AM
Total Posts: 37705 Unread Msg 219912.23

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what about "A year without Santa Claus"....the animated special?

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Rebel_G
To : coybacon251

Date: 12/27/2007 06:23:02 AM
Total Posts: 37705 Msg 219912.24

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Surprisingly well. I didn't really say much and she immediately stopped all of that "Santa" shit and started handing the kids presents and saying who they were from. now thats interesting!

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coybacon251
To : Rebel_G

Date: 12/27/2007 11:15:32 AM
Total Posts: 19578 Msg 219912.25

in Reply To :

Surprisingly well. I didn't really say much and she immediately stopped all of that "Santa" shit and started handing the kids presents and saying who they were from.

now thats interesting!

I was actually mildly surprised that it went down as easily as it did, and I didn't really want to make a scene, but this was more a matter of her trying to force a dead issue than me dropping some kind of bomb shell.

GH: Who in your mind are some of the best defensive players over the last 40 years?
MB: That's a mix. Lemar Parrish and Kenny Riley were great cornerbacks. Tommy Casanova was a tremendous free safety. (David) Fulcher was an overpowering strong safety. Bill Bergey was a first-rate linebacker. Coy Bacon is the best pass rusher we ever had.

Coy had 22 sacks (in '76). He was the best pass rusher I've ever seen.