An excerpt from 'White Lines'

Sunny stood at the sink, having just washed her hands. She had a small pocket-sized mirror on the counter, with a long white line of cocaine lying across it. Sunny held one nostril and snorted the line of coke through the other, looking up at Jada’s reflection in the mirror when she was done. Sunny smiled at the look on Jada’s face as she stared longingly at the cocaine, and then looked at Sunny in shock.

Sunny could tell by the look on Jada’s face that she wanted some. Jada all but salivated at the sight of the cocaine, and she instinctively looked around for Born, half expecting him to walk into the men’s bathroom at any moment. Sunny saw Jada look around, and she smiled once more. “Girl, relax. Ain’t nobody coming in here. I locked the door.” She saw her friend stare at the white line again, saw the look of pure longing on her face. Jada’s eyes were focused on the powder diamonds lying invitingly across the surface of the mirror. She saw the little crystals in it, looking like tiny shards of glass, and she knew that this was the good shit. “Look at you fiendin’,” she said, jokingly. “I can tell by the look on your face that you indulge. Help yourself.”

Jade felt a tug-o-war in her heart. She considered telling Sunny that she was a recovering addict. She considered saying no, and just leaving the bathroom. But standing there in front of the drug unsupervised by Born for the first time since she left rehab, Jada wanted nothing more than to feel the euphoria that cocaine brought her. She salivated at the thought of experiencing that feeling again. She looked at Sunny, and her friend smiled, encouragingly. Jada told herself that this wasn’t crack. She could control this urge, she reasoned. The high wouldn’t be as noticeable. This was something she could handle. This would be different. She could keep this a secret. As if reading her mind, Sunny said, “I won’t tell Born as long as you don’t tell Dorian.”

Jada closed her eyes, sweat forming on her face, and swallowed hard. She look at Sunny, and then at the line of white powder, and she inched closer to it. Standing directly in front of it, Jada’s gaze was fixed. She leaned over, and snorted the rest of it, instantly feeling the effects. This was some good shit!

Jada stood up tall and straight when she was finished, and looked at her reflection in the mirror. Her pupils were dilated and she felt a surge of energy. It was an amazing rush. Jada felt instantly at home. She felt alive again, and the euphoria was so familiar. It felt so perfect, just like old times. She relished the feeling since it had been so long since she’d experienced the wonders of a cocaine high. Sunny smiled, just as zooted as her friend.

“Come on. Now the party will be way better!”

They emerged from the men’s bathroom undetected and blended back into the crowd. They wandered toward the far side of the club, where there were more people dancing and enjoying themselves than standing around staring. There they danced, in a place all their own. For over an hour they danced and mingled with a handful of Born’s friends from around the way. Chance noticed that Jada was a lot more talkative and energetic than usual, but he figured that was because she was drinking and enjoying herself. Sunny was her usual ball of energy, and they all hung out enjoying themselves, until Chance and his boys wandered off. Finding a table on the opposite side of the party from where Born and Dorian were holding court, Sunny and Jada sat and enjoyed the rush of their respective highs. And just as Sunny had predicted, the party was way more enjoyable for both of them.

After another half an hour or so, the feeling wore off, and Jada sat back, feeling like her old self again. Sunny snapped her fingers and sang along with Lil Kim. “Get money!” She looked over at Jada and smiled at her friend. Jada smiled back.

“I’m so glad I got a friend who parties,” Sunny said. Jada caught her meaning of the term “parties,” and smiled. “I always take a twenty or a fifty of Dorian’s shit for myself. You don’t steal bags from Born when he bags up?” Sunny asked, amazed.

Jada felt tremendous guilt then, at the mention of Born’s name. Damn! She was instantly filled with regret. What had she done?

Jada shook her head. “I don’t think I could bring myself to steal from Born.” Her tone of voice was sad and filled with remorse.

Sunny pursed her lips. “Shiiiiit! I don’t consider it stealing. What’s his is mine, you know what I’m saying?” She crossed her legs and continued snapping her fingers, dancing in her seat, clearly unfazed and not feeling the same guilty torment that Jada was enduring.

Jada looked around the party and saw some familiar faces from her days living in West Brighton. She spotted Phillip, a guy she messed around with when she and Shante were being scandalous for crack money. She remembered fucking Phillip for ten dollars back then. Thinking of the fact the she’d just gotten high again, she cringed. Jada silently assured herself that she would never stoop that low again. She was in a loving relationship with a man she respected. She had money and status, and if she wanted to party with Sunny from time to time, she figured there was nothing wrong with that. She wasn’t going to be a crackhead again.